Texting Your Ex Girlfriend Late at Night – 3 Things to Avoid

Question:  I have been sending a few text messages here and there to my ex girlfriend and she seems to be receptive to them. One thing that I have wondered is, what is the deal with sending texts late at night. I usually get the urge to text her when I am sitting at home, watching television and a lot of the times, that means late at night. What are some things that I need to avoid doing if I am going to text her late at night?

Answer:  10 or 15 years ago, the question would have been pretty much the same, except that you would have been asking about calling her late at night and not texting. So, this isn’t some unknown territory. Guys have gotten that urge late at night to call up an ex girlfriend for decades and now when they get the urge, it’s about texting and not calling. Still, most of those old school principles are the same.

Here are three things that you want to avoid if you are thinking about texting her late at night:

1. You want to avoid texting her too late.

You should have some idea of what her schedule is. If she goes to bed at 11 pm, you don’t want to text her too close to that time or after that time. Stay within a couple of hours of her bedtime, so if her habit is to go to bed at 11, don’t text after 9 pm.

2. Don’t make it a sexting thing.

I don’t know exactly what you mean by “urge” but for a lot of guys that translates to the fact that they want to talk dirty to their ex girlfriend. Don’t do it. Sexting her doesn’t really do much as far as making her want you sexually when she is your ex girlfriend and to be honest, that is probably one of the first things that she is going to assume that you are going to do.

3. If you are going to go back and forth a lot of times, just call her up.

You really want to make a good impression on your ex girlfriend? You want to be able to make her feel attraction and rapport? Get her talking to you on the phone. Texts are good for short communication, not long. So, if you are going to end up having a conversation, get her on the phone instead. Avoid the texting back and forth 20 times kind of thing if you can.

3 Of the most common texting mistakes guys unknowingly make nearly all the time

The texting game is one that you need to learn.

However,  it’s not one that anyone’s really going to teach you.  It’s another one of those things that you are just supposed to figure out all on your own.  And because of that,  it’s nearly inevitable that you are going to make a lot of mistakes.

Of course,  we can workaround that.  Because,  we can look at 3 of the most common texting mistakes guys unknowingly make nearly all the time and when you can avoid those … you’ll be much better off.

So are you ready to find out what these 3 texting mistakes are?

The first texting mistake guys unknowingly make is …

They text way too often.

For the most part,  texting isn’t like having a phone conversation.  You don’t have to go back and forth and back and forth and back and forth.  It’s okay to have a time gap in between your texts to a woman.

Having those gaps achieves a few things:

1)  It suggests that you are busy and not just sitting around waiting to text her.
2)  It gives both you and her time to think about your replies.
3)  It takes most of the “pressure” off of a conversation.

Don’t be like most guys and assume that texting her over and over is a good thing.  It’s not.  If you do,  it quickly becomes annoying.  It makes you seem like you have no life.  And it shows that you aren’t really up on the texting game.

The second texting mistake guys unknowingly make is …

They try to be funny and it doesn’t land.

Words on a screen don’t pack the same punch that spoken words do.  When you tell a joke in person,  you are giving off signals that you can’t when it’s just words on a screen.  There’s no vocal tonality.  There’s no emotion on your face.  And there’s none of the other body language tells that make it clear you are just joking.

Plenty of times,  I’ve heard guys complain about texting a woman what was supposed to be a joke and the woman takes it the wrong way.

Read your text back in several different moods before you send it.  If it sounds like it can be taken the wrong way …

Chances are good the joke won’t land well.

If that’s the case,  don’t send it.

And the third texting mistake guys unknowingly make is …

They send sexual texts and it gets weird.

If you don’t already know it,  women and men don’t usually think of the same things when they think of “dirty talk.”  What women think of is usually along the lines of romance and what guys usually think of is along the lines of what you’d read in an adult magazine.

Take a cue from all the politicians and athletes and celebrities who’ve had their sexual texts get taken in a weird way.

Don’t send it.

That’s not to say that you can never have sexual texting (sexting) going on.  But you do have to know that most of the time,  when guys try it,  they end up weirding out the woman and not turning her on.

Okay,  so this post isn’t going to give you all that you need to know when it comes to texting women.  But it should give you a good jumpstart.  Like I said,  this is all stuff that you are supposed to figure out all on your own.

And that means most guys screw it up more often than not.

But you won’t be like most guys.

If you avoid these 3 mistakes.

My Ex Girlfriend Has Been Sending Me Text Messages

Okay, so your ex girlfriend has started to send you text messages, kind of out of the blue, and you are curious as to what that actually might mean.

  • Does it mean that she wants you back?
  • Does it mean that she just wants to be friends with you?

These kinds of things can make your mind race, going from one thought to another and all you really want to be able to do is to make some sense of it. If your ex girlfriend is sending you text messages, does it mean that she wants you back?

It all depends, really.

It depends on when she sends them, what frequency, what she actually texts you, etc.

Here are some things that you want to look out for so you know what is going on when your ex girlfriend starts to text you again:

1. Simple conversations that sound like friend talk, usually means that she is looking for a friend to talk to.

If she sends you texts like, Hey wat’s up? or guess what happened… , those kinds of texts are pretty friend like, so it would probably mean that what she is doing is she is just looking for a friend to talk to and you happen to be there. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, because you can turn that around and make her want you again, but it takes a little time and know how to do that.

2. If her text messages are really personal, sexual, or show that she is really curious about you, that indicates that she is looking for intimacy of some kind.

Of course, not all intimacy means sex. However, women usually only look for that kind of intimacy with someone that they are attracted to or have a romantic interest, so you probably want to assume that she does still like you on some level as more than a friend. That is a GOOD THING. You can take a situation like this and really amplify that attraction so that she wants you back pretty quickly.

3. Late night text messages are also usually a good thing.

When it comes to texting, late night texts generally mean that you are more than just someone that she wants to talk to. Sure, there are examples of this where that is not the case, but most of the time this is a scenario that you can have some fun with and usually means that you DO have a good chance of being able to get back with her.